About EFT

ABOUT EMOTIONALLY FOCUSED THERAPY

Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT)

The Hold Me Tight® workshop was designed by author, researcher and clinician, Dr. Sue Johnson and her groundbreaking work in Emotionally Focused Therapy for couples (www.drsuejohnson.com/about). EFT is rooted in Attachment Theory, which says that we all need a safe, strong emotional connection to those who mean the most to us.

We need to know that we matter and we can count on those we love for support and nurture. Infants need parents or caregivers. But, adults need a close bond too. We never outgrow the need for secure connection (attachment). It is the key to well being, security and happiness throughout our lives. Without that secure connection, we struggle emotionally; intimate relationships like marriage suffer when partners lose their sense of safety and trust. We find ourselves at a loss; in a sense, our very survival feels at stake. We then fall into hurtful, unhealthy patterns of conflict with our partner. 

These negative patterns, or cycles, take over and what should be the most secure and rewarding relationship in life instead becomes a source of pain. If our intimate partner, the one we turn to for comfort and connection, feels more like a stranger or an enemy, we end up isolated, confused, frustrated and sad. Whether we battle constantly or endure a "cold war," we suffer from the disconnection. To varying degrees and in different ways, we all get stuck in these cycles. What we conflict about may vary from couple to couple, but the cycle manifests in predictable patterns. EFT helps couples understand those patterns. 

Attachment theory has decades of study behind it. EFT stands at the crossroads of research and romance and offers healing for distressed relationships, bringing couples real hope. EFT is a state of the art approach, considered the “gold standard" in the field. No other approach in couples therapy has shown such positive outcomes over time. Through EFT, couples can interrupt their negative patterns, restore safety and create a strong, secure bond that can last a lifetime, even if that bond seemed completely broken. Through this powerful therapy, couples restructure their connection in real time, in session; it is an experiential model, unlike other therapies.

Hold Me Tight® workshops utilize the research, theory and practices of the EFT model in an educational, experiential program that can bring new energy and connection to every couple. To learn more about EFT, contact the International Center for Excellence in Emotionally Focused Therapy (www.ICEEFT.com). And, check out the video below by Sue Johnson.

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